We are caregivers - A mother's story about her young adult son who lives with paranoid schizophrenia

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Morning Zen Guest Blogger ~ Melanie Jimenez 
Writing the truth to help fight the stigma that surrounds the diagnosis and to help people better understand the illness. 

We Are Caregivers 
Often there isn’t a lot said about the caregivers for someone with schizophrenia. We tend to show up in stories written by the media after a tragedy happens and then we are put under a microscope for people to determine if we have done the right thing in raising, caring for, and protecting our loved ones. Often the judgment comes down on us from those who don’t have the first clue what it’s like to be a caregiver. It’s so easy for them to say what they would have done differently if THEY were the ones deciding the fate of our loved ones with schizophrenia. It’s so easy for them yet it is one of our most difficult jobs and one that we pour our heart and soul into daily.

To begin with and most importantly there is love. We, as caregivers, love our person with schizophrenia with our whole hearts. If we are parents to someone with schizophrenia there is also an even tighter bond because our child was created by us, born to us, and lovingly raised by us. We have ALL given pieces of ourselves, sacrificed our own way of life for them and have spent many late nights worrying and praying. Behind the closed doors of our homes or a therapist’s office or a psychiatrist’s office we put our heads together to decide what is best for our loved one and sometimes our choices work but more often we are less than successful. You see, it’s isn’t easy caring for our loved one. Besides making normal life decisions, we are also forced pretty often to decide FOR our loved ones what is best for them. Sometimes, though, we fail in our choices and find ourselves in a quiet room, our heads in our hands, defeated. The beautiful thing about we caregivers, though, is that we never give up. 


Then there is tenacity. We caregivers are fighters to the bitter end. We fight for proper medical care, humane treatment and respect for our loved ones. We are advocates of the strongest kind and we are a force to be reckoned with. Often you will find us fighting for rights to see our loved ones locked behind hospital doors hoping for a chance to talk to their doctors and offer insight that no one has but us. We are found on trails and surface streets wearing our t-shirt in support of our cause while we walk, run and bike for miles to raise money for research. We sit quietly at our desks writing a check or two to our favorite organization that supports and educates others about schizophrenia and other mental illnesses. In the smallest, yet biggest way, our sometimes quiet voices raise up in earnest to defend our loved ones to family members and friends who just don’t seem to get it. We are fighters, we are advocates, we are the voice of our loved one with schizophrenia. 

In the end, we are human. We are flawed and we make mistakes. In the end, after we have given our heart and soul, sometimes we aren’t successful in our fight. In the end, love does not always conquer all. In the end though we did everything we could and we did it with love, with intelligence, with experience and with a fight rivaling that of a mother bear defending her cubs against the predators that threaten their life. 

We are caregivers. We are mothers, fathers, wives and husbands. We are children fighting to understand our parent with schizophrenia and we are friends accepting our loved one for exactly who they are. We are caregivers, people from around the world giving all we have to love, protect and care for our loved one with schizophrenia. We are caregivers and we will be here to the bitter end even when society has walked away condemning our loved ones for simply being human. 

We are caregivers and we are strong. Do not underestimate us. We are here and we are not giving up.

melanieMelanie Jimenez is the creator of the blog Understanding Schizophrenia. She started the blog to help bring awareness to the realities of schizophrenia. "I wanted to be sure that people got a perspective other than the one that the media portrays. My blog shows the candid and raw point of view of what it's like for me raising, living with, and loving my son who has paranoid schizophrenia." You can read more of her written essays here.



  1. Anand's avatar
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    Schizophrenia is fully curable with Niacin. Vit B3 VIT C zinc magnesium and B6
    Pls Google and read watch Dr Abraham Hoffer - stop suffering
  2. Briona Kennedy's avatar
    Briona Kennedy
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    NATURAL CURE TO MENTAL ILLNESS: I’m so appreciative for this type of platform, it gives us all opportunity to openly share our experiences without fear of shame. It is no longer a news that there is permanent cure to schizophrenia. My daughter was diagnosed of schizophrenia 15 years ago, over those time, I spent more time in hospital than out of hospital without much improvement. It was difficult and humbling, she had a major breakthrough only with CONSUMMO treatment. We're so proud that we've done it all to save her, She now think more clearly. She has grown as a person in all facets of life. She more compassionate, intelligent, wise, sociable, and actionable! I see people suffering with uneffective treatment. For more detail on CONSUMMO, kindly visit this blog: curetoschizophrenia.blogspot.com, And if you have used this medicine in the past, I will advice you create an awareness to help others, because, every family that has a mentally ill patient are battling unimaginable pain. The ultimate value of life depends upon awareness. Thank you
  3. Elle's avatar
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    My 24yr old son is autistic, bipolar and schizophrenic. Me, I am his only caregiver. I am falling apart. I have lost hope. It started when he was 3 with the doctors and special ed for the autism and sensory ect. Tons of specialist..ect..I had hope he would get better. Then he had health issues and several surgeries by the age of 11. I thought we will get through this. It will get better. Then the psychosis started and even more hell rained down. Mental hospitals, group homes, more doctor medication after medication. Hospital after hospital. I still had hope it would get better. Then adult hood. Omg! Hell got worse. Full blown psychotic break. My son is mentally gone. Hospital after hospital. I cry everyday. I search and serch for help. Care teams ect. I have no more hope. I am drained. I am lost. 24 years of heart break and pain. This country has a piss poor mental health care. There is no help at all. Its a big joke! We need long term mental health!!!!!! I am miserable. My son is gone mentally and he is on medication and it is not helping. I am at the point of hopelessness and no return. I wish for death. Living in this torment and hell if far worse than death. But I get up every day begrudgingly and face the world. Because there is no one else to help my son but me. I dont even know how to help anymore. It takes such a toll on me to have to call the police on him so they can have him commited to the hospital over and over and over again. Only to keep him a few days and send him back just a sick as he went in. So to any ahole that thinks the caregivers dont do enougb. WRONG!! Is our sorry excuse for mental health in this country. There is no help. Maybe if you have tons of money and can afford to spend 30k per month for one of the plush mental health resorts. Haha. Otherwise, your loved one gets a quick diagnosis a script and pushed out the door as long as they are not homicidal or suicidal. No matter if the are still talking to satellites or the new Jesus. Thats the best you get. Maybe by some miricle this country may get a clue and bring back longterm care for the severely mentally ill.
    Done with my rant. God help me and my son!
  4. lysanne's avatar
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    My 25 year old son was never diagnosed until the age of 17 though I always knew something was not right. He was diagnosed with Aspergers and I was in complete agreement then. He spent 8 months (YES, 8 months!) in the mental ward because there was no where else for him to go.....he had made threats against me so home was not an option for a while. That stay surely contributed to his PTSD which started in grade school from being bullied and unable to make sense of it or defend himself. When he stopped taking his meds last year things fell apart between us and he wants nothing to do with us even though we send money and hire a cleaning lady to help him. He is paranoid and thinks I am trying to control him. He hates the word "responsability" and has no sense of it. He is sweet and kind and tortured and will not let himself be loved. Somewhere along the way he forgot that he was loved......can it be that simple? That they feel unloved and undeserving and so they sabotage themselves???
  5. Ven's avatar
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    My son is 18 and recovering from his first hospitalization for paranoid delusions. I am horrified, lost, hysterical. Is schizophrenia a fate worse than death? Is there a torment worse than schizophrenia? Why must it take everything a beautiful intelligent young man has to live for and make life unrecognizably terrible? We must fight for those who don't know that they are ill to access treatment. Right now in the US consumers have the right to be psychotic and unmedicated, and we family members do not have any rights or authority, but must take full responsibility. We must fight for the rights of the schizophrenically disabled to get professional care: housing, social security/disability, health care. I cant think how this could ever be provided to people who are so disabled. Please let me know, but Ive been to NAMI and I think I heard them say that for thousands of years and millions of consumers there has been no effective treatment and nothing but terrible suffering till death. They are all about helping families to cope and those lucky ones who's consumer responds well to the medications do ok, but for the rest, there is only hell to pay. Your voices in blogs like this one might one day help those of us who take responsibility for our loved ones get the authority we need to make a difference, change laws, get help. Until that day, we live in the quietly hysterical understanding that love is not enough to save the people we love, or ourselves from a fate worse than death. We are not giving up and we are not dead yet!
  6. Courtney Morgan's avatar
    Courtney Morgan
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    I’m so appreciative for this type of platform, it gives us all opportunity to openly share our experiences without fear of shame. It is no longer a news that there is permanent cure to schizophrenia with CONSUMMO. I would like to share our daughter's experiences with schizophrenia so that others experiencing the same thing can read the blog and find comfort knowing they are not alone, and possibly hope and faith in knowing that they can also be cure someday using CONSUMMO. Every family that has a mentally ill child needs help. And the only way to do this is to create awareness. My daughter was diagnosed of schizophrenia 15 years ago. Her first noticeable symptoms was at 18. It wasn’t an easy trip. She was labelled as having persecurtory delusions, auditory hallucinations and negative symptoms. She normally hear commands being unbearably loud, telling her to harm herself including me and other people. Most violence committed by the severely mentally ill is committed against themselves. Suddenly she had no friends, she was neglected badly and sectioned as a danger to self. She is a very kind and compassionate girl but schizophrenia wouldn't just let her function normally. We tried to help, took her to different psychiatrist, change her med. with no difference, some work with severe complications. Over the previous of four years I had spent more time in hospital than out of hospital. We were told about Consummo 4years ago but my daughter wouldn't just agree to take any medicine. It's been difficult and humbling, but we're proud that we've done it all to save her.I wouldn't have given up my daughter if she had leukemia. So why would I give up custody for mental illness? There is no bounds to my love for her. After much persuasion, she sign herself into using CONSUMMO treatment. I find it to be a very effective medication. Within months of using it, she could think more clearly. Through it all, Dr Justin has been our rock, encouraging me that it will work out. It been 8months now since my daughter is well. She has grown as a person in all facets of life. She more compassionate, intelligent, wise, sociable, and actionable! She now run her own business! It’s great.

    I will advice you to visit this blog curetoschizophrenia.blogspot.com, And if you have used this medicine, I will advice you create an awareness to help others. Thank you.
  7. Carol's avatar
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    I don't think there is anything for our poor sons and daughters. Having "hope" is unrealistic. No one cares about our children with schizophrenia and their and our tragedies. If our children were covered with cancerous tumors, there would be great sympathy, great outpouring of concern, and perhaps "Go Fund Me's" galore to enfold them in loving, gentle, understanding care .
    Our children's needs include keeping them in truly safe places, attempting to treat their symptoms with daily intense individual care, ind-depth testing, in-depth diagnosing, nutrition, meaningful human interactions, activity, meaningful work, and maybe short-term use of medication (with a goal of minimal or no medication long term.) Time spent for care would not be limited. Necessary care would span the lifetime. Understanding and connection with kind , gentle ,and patient members of a WHOLE TEAM OF CAREGIVERS (that also includes family members) is what our children need for the rest of their lives. It takes a village to care for a mentally ill individual.
    But as things stand today, even though most of us by ourselves can't possibly provide optimal care (money or no money), we must outlive our ill children. That's the only option I see. So, tell me, how will we manage that?
  8. Reese's avatar
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    Hi everybody. My name is Reese and I am 33 and have schizoaffective disorder. I had some rough years but I live a pretty good life now. My meds are working, I live in a great supportive housing situation and I have a boyfriend for the past five years. I live a quiet life and enjoy spending time with my family these days.

    I had many years of cycling in and out of the hospital, and was homeless for awhile, and my parents didn't know where I was for two years after I hopped a bus across the country. It was a total nightmare for everybody and I'm surprised I survived.

    I just wanted to write something positive because I really feel for so many people with this illness and their families. The turning point for me has been being on injections so I don't forget to take my meds, and my family getting support and help and better understanding how to help me, through the schizophrenia society in Canada. It was very touch and go for a long time, but I know many people who have stability with this illness and meaning and friends.

    All the best,
  9. Gayle's avatar
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    My son was 17 years old, 2 months from his 18th birthday and 3 months from graduating high school with an internship to any tech company in silicon valley of his choosing. A scholarship to Stanford University. Then he became ill. I was able to notice it and luckily caught it early on because I had worked for behavioral health services and knew a little or just enough to identify what i was seeing. My son was, is, the most brillant star in the sky. But I mourn everyday for what should have been for him. The future that he lost. The potential. But I also feel selfish. That I lost this person that I knew. It feels like the person I knew died, but I dont dare mourn, because I KNOW that death is far worse than what I am feeling but, what I feel is that he is gone. And I dont know how to wrap my brain around it. And thats where Im stuck. I will take care of him till the day I die, and gladly, without hesitation, but on a selfish level. I miss him.
  10. Maggie's avatar
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    My son was fine through his second year at an Ivy League university, then problems showed up especially when he moved off campus. He was always sloppy but interestingly enough he wanted only white very clean and crisp underwear when he was little. But at university, the slop and grime and hygiene was less then lacking. Somehow, he got through his final year and graduated, and I am grateful for that but at the university he visited the health clinic many times for headaches thinking something was wrong with him. One year he had very serious shoulder surgery after which he refused to take any pain medication and of course regretted it when the anaesthesia wore off. Years following school he was unable to find a job and we noticed odd behavior such as writing millions of little notes to himself, notes of positive inspiring thoughts, he read a lot of self help books, and books about how to knock women off their feet, etc. at times he felt he was brilliant and could write a book, at other times he seemed to be unable to find the right niche and disliked the regulated 9`5 world. He holed up at an apartment in a big city once without a job for months, writing little notes, living in sloppiness and telling us that he was always looking for work but I am not sure if this was true or not. It was only recently that due to changes in the family situation and the deaths of grandparents, had his condition changed for the worse. He took an online course to keep busy claiming that it would help him network to find work. But paranoid delusions began and it was their impossiibility that finally led us to seek psychiatric therapy and counseling. He was paranoid and suspicious that someone was invading his life and watching him on line and everywhere. He was speaking to me, his mom, in a low voice, so they would not hear. he would feel they drugged his food or somehow did something bad to him. He would buy drug tests and hiv tests, all negative. He would ask for an MRI for his headaches in the past too, al negative. Physically, he was fit. He would purchase new iphone, new ipad, new TV, to keep the stalkers that he thought were around him at bay. He would post notes about being hacked on facebook. He said he had great headaches and thought he had some illness that we just have not found yet. It was very very very difficult to get him immediate psychiatric care especially because we had no primary care doctor. He is 25 and is on my insurance onyl for a few more months and that concerns me. His psychiatrist feels it is some sort of psychoses., of which paranoia is a symptom, that is all we know so far. He can 'fake it' well and seem normal in pubic, or with friends although he always has this intense thinking look on his face, with thinking lines on his forehead. sometimes when he thinks deeply, his eyes dart from left to right as if looking for words or thoughts. He does not like to be touched or babied, although he loved it as a teen. He has lost a lot of weight because he refuses to eat food I cook preferring to make his own eggs and buy his own food. His psychiatrist has started him on low dose Abilify and we are at the stage where he is refusing to take his medication. This is very difficult because he pretends to take the pill, then hides it. I can never be sure if he took it. Now I am refusing to give him the care keys ( he wants to 'drive around') unless he takes the pill in front of me. I would just like to see him stabliziled and to have me son back. Thanks for listening. I would love to advocate for faster and longer term support and care.
  11. EHunter's avatar
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    I am new to all of this. My eldest son was just diagnosed in April of this year as a Paranoid Schizophrenic and I have no clue as to where to begin. I have worked in healthcare for 17 1/2 years, so I kind of know the laws and rights of patients, but because my son is 19 I can't make any decisions for him and he has been Baker Acted 3 times since April and refuses to take his medication. He tells me that there is nothing wrong with him and that he doesn't need any help or medication because it doesn't work. I just want what's right for his situation and for him to get the help that he needs. He has a job and does a great job at it, but I'm afraid that he will lose it because he refuses to get or take the help that he needs.

    Can someone give me some insight as to what I should or could do to intervene and help my son help himself?
  12. Rluck's avatar
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    My beautiful sweet son had addiction in his late teens and we did hard love and got him in rehabs and suboxone and methadone. Two days after going off methadone he ran off and he stayed up all night and took something with a neighbor boy and that morning he committed robbery with a small knife at a shop and got nothing but did get 1 year in prison. He got clean there and when he got out seemed fine and was clean but couldnt seem to connect or keep a job. After a while of just staying in his room he started to have delusions and asked for help. I started calling drs. and anyone including crisis prevention. Several people came to the house and talked to him but he got worse fast. In days he was so paranoid he wouldnt talk to anyone. I got him to a hospital and he ran off. I got him back. He finally called the police and told him how everyone around him was threatening him. He asked them to take him to the hospital again and he stayed this time and they have kept him now for about 40 days. Im scared for him. I think if he doesnt have me he will die. I would like proof that Oxycontin does not cause, cause psychotic symptoms/behavior/disease. Ive not seen proof only speculation. I would like to sue the makers of oxycotin if they caused my beautiful son through his abuse of the drug to have this terrible condition. Its so hard to get help, (more then just talking). What did they do before they figured out diabetes. Did they just say your crazy get out of here, or let talk. At some point they figured out the cause and an effective treatment. I cant help but think they arent doing enough investigation into this disease that is physical! ... if you consider the brain to be a part of your body like any other part. They say its mental illness which makes me think its made up or imagined but its not its physical, its material, it can be measured and tracked and documented like diabetes can affect one mentally so this may have a physical cause.
  13. Chris's avatar
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    I have a 26 year old son that was diagnosed about two years ago, but we did not know this was the diagnosis until last April. My son is smart and funny and just graduated collage with a bachelor's degree a major and a minor. He can not get a job, he has been on about 40 interviews and I don't know what he says in them but no-one will hire him. This started when he was about 20 years old, became very paranoid, scared and thought there was someone out to kill us all, his whole family. He has been hospitalized on his own accord 4 times, has gone through Electro Convulsive Therapy to no avail.
    I do notice he gets very lazy, stays in his room a lot, and really has no friends. I worry that he is lonely and will do something bad to himself because of this. He is on medication and sees a psychiatrist once a month, and I have to say he is doing better, but not the man I knew, not the son I had.
    I also worry what will happen to him when I am gone, I am in my late fifties and he is still on my insurance so he can get the meds and the doctors appointment's he needs. He lives with his stepdad and me and his brother who will be going back to school soon. Then the real loneliness sets in I would think. I have to say I took my son to Mclean Hospital in Belmont Massachusetts ... voted # 3 in the country for psychiatric, and if it were not for them, I don't know where we would be . They saved his life. But he still is not right and I do worry about him all the time. He changes minute by minute so you just never know what you are getting.
    As far as work goes I am nor sure if he will ever work again, he wants to very much but just can not seem to get hired. When he does get hired he does not live up to the expectations for himself or for the company. I am so sad, that's about all I can say . I am very sad and scared for him. But like so many others I WILL NEVER GIVE UP ON HIM, WHEN HE CAN NO LONGER FIGHT FOR HIMSELF HE CAN LEAN ON ME AND WE WILL PUCH ON.
  14. A j c's avatar
    A j c
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    FIRST I AM A BEAUTIFUL WOMENS WITH A HIGH HEART FULL OF PATIENCE LOVE Understanding and Compassion, I am a caregiver, but I don't use that phrase although that's my job title, I prefer to be A FRIEND, I take care of a young women with skitsiphrania, paranoid behaviors etc, hullusinates, everything, she is beautiful, giving, spirited, loving, and highly intelligent, definitely knows how to get what she wants lol, we met a very short time ago and I just love her, yes I was kinda scared at first she tells me what she sees and talks to people and animals that I don't see to mean REAL CONVERSATIONS, How do I really know she really doesn't see this, I DON'T, AND I DON'T JUDGE, I tel her I sure wish I could converse with you and your friends and animals she tells me you may someday, I just say OK I hope to meet all of them SEE WE DON'T REALLY KNOW DO WE, maybe it's real, maybe not but who cares as long as it's positive interaction we should be thankful, I've really been blessed for such experiences in my career, I really believe this was my calling
  15. Nancy's avatar
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    I have two children, one daughter and one son. I believe they both have schizophrenia. They both are so abusive verbally to me; it is so exhausting and depressing for me. I am blamed for everything by both of them. I read all of your posts and they left me sad.
  16. Jennifer Warren's avatar
    Jennifer Warren
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    Thank you for this wonderful information and blog post. My daughter is suffering from some form of psychosis right now (it's been going on for 2 months) and we suspect schizo-affective disorder because this is in our family. My daughter is 24 and she has fears and delusions that I am trying to hurt her and she doesn't trust me at all. She has been back and forth to mental health facilities over the last 2 months and each time she goes, she tells the medical staff to put me on a "no contact" list and threatens to sue them if they talk to me. Therefore, I feel like I can't be an advocate for her and explain things to them because they are in fear of talking to me. Is this common for a mentally ill person to not trust the one person who has always been there for them? How do you deal with this? I feel so helpless...
  17. Gwen M Doll's avatar
    Gwen M Doll
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    My Dad and I were savagely attacked on Christmas Eve 2016 by my 32 year old mentally ill son. He threatened to kill his whole family. He almost killed me. He beat me so bad it broke my pelvis in 2 places and my sacrum. I was in organ failure , which the miracle working doctors and nurses got me through. I was in the hospital for nearly a month. My son has been in custody at the New Orleans Parish jail since the incident. There is a no contact order for my Dad and myself. He was deemed competent to stand trial, which I find unbelievable considering the violence and severity of his attack on me that was completely unprovoked. He just snapped. Can someone help me??
  18. Lynne Prestwood's avatar
    Lynne Prestwood
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    My son is 26 and was diagnosed with paranoid shizophrenia last year. It is so heartbreaking to see your son go from being a very intelligent person to just being a shell of a person who does not care about anything, who will not go anywhere, who just stays in his room day and night. He is receiving SSI so he puts some money toward the rent and he goes to the store and buys food for himself, mostly junk so he has gained a lot of weight. He used to be so skinney. He took up smoking. He also claims that the voices he hears are telepathy and that he can make them stop if he finds the right spot in his brain. I have yet to find a support group to go to help figure out how to help him have a life.
  19. Kelly's avatar
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    I witnessed my handsome strong son play varsity High School baseball and take his girlfriend to the prom. To then run out of class in his Senior year saying the classmates and teachers were talking about him in class. He was experimenting with pot so I thought it was paranoid behavior from the pot. Today's pot has 10x more potent effects then back in the 80s. Was it the chicken or the egg? Did the pot cause this mental gene to express? Or did he reach for the pot to help him drown out he voices? I will never know.

    What I do know is every medical treatment is first diagnosed with physical testing and deep exploration to diagnose it properly. I have read that there are physical issues With schizophrenia and there are up to 7 types of schizo. Bipolar also looks like schizo at times due to delusions. My son is resistant to take any antipsychotics. He has transformed from a strong young man to a psychotic frail thin young man with a distant intense look in his face. When he has brief moments of being present you see the change In his face. The anitpsychotics started his body issues twitchig face a runching nose blinking a lot. His body pelvis and legs causing issues with his gate and balance and he complained of it bothering him feel g uncomfortable he calls it dissolving. He was speaking of spirits and became a chain smoker until he lost his jobs, his reason "because the people are sketchy and weird he said." I dove deep into research after his first extreme panic or delusion where he thought my mother poisoned his fruit salad and screamed to us he she is a witch and she poisoned him. Unfortunately he claims now that he was falsely persecuted as he was not suicidal but committed. While he was in the hospital he swears he was raped while they drugged him. So now I have a PTSD patient on my hands due to medical intervention. They released him on antipsychotics saying he was well to go home while he spoke of spirits and levitating paper when I picked him up. So much for more modern medicine.
    Was his rape adelusion or was he a easy target for a staff member or patient predator. Now he iwants to sue everyone. The hospital had no documentation on any of these claims but he was moved to a private room during his stay.

    I have taken a FMLA, having severe anxiety and chest pains while dealing with my son in crisis with this nightmare and trying to deal with a high level sales job for a corporate company that requires much travel.

    My husband can't handle my son because he states my husband is cheating on me because the spirits told him while he was in the hospital. He gets in my husbands face and states you know what you are doing to my mother. I have no worry about my husband and tell my son it is not his business to worry about this. I trust my husband completely then he tells me I am an idiot.

    Through the past three years of his health decline we practiced strong boundaries and tough love. Now at this point we don't want more trauma In his life. NAMI and others say it is so important to take care of yourself first because if you fall apart he has no help. So we have a date night weekly , we set up a home monitor camera. Tuesday's we attend NAMI support.

    I am showing my son therapy is okay and we are getting therapy. He is afraid to admit anything or get help for fear of commitment. I say to him now that I will not have him committed as long as he is working on his health. He is trusting me more. I read a great book called unchain your brain, a book called nutrient power, books by Carl pfeifer, Mark Vonnegut who is a patient who became a pediatrician the best in Boston and is he son of Kurt. I think food matters mostly as his diet fell apart when they were playing ball and traveling a lot in their teen years. Our bodies are weakened then add cell phone and social media as a stressor and tip of the extreme stress on the weakened altered mind still developing. Why is there so much ADD, Autism, anxiety I this generation of children. WIFI is always on cell phones live on their bodies, food is GMO and full of chemicals. Marijuana is highest hybrid potent formulas. Pain killers like OXY should be outlawed as rewires the brain in the most precious brain developing years of young athletes.

    However they fundamental lesson I wish I had was brain education in primary school on.
    What food does hat food matters and our schools use nutrition in their cafeterias with nutritionist. Why is celiac and gluten sensiivity so increased these days. We are poisoned
    With bad labeling so called healthy foods just look at the ingedients and look up each ingredient for the truth.
    I am working on holistic life changes, food matters is a movie you should see. Our jails are full of mentally ill suffered from poor lifetime diets. Countries who practice good food ethics have low criminal rates and mental health issues. However our country is all about Capitalism and food shelf life is profits! See Michael Moores latest movie on other countries and conquering a good policy and bringing it back to America.

    Margo Kidder has a MI and she did a documentary online search You Tube for Mask of madness, search Carl Pfeifer and his work on Niacin, search Dr. Amodore and his speeches in how to speak and question effectively to a schizo. Search Riordan and his work with orthomolecular medicine. Today hospitals are fighting sepsis and superbugs and losing millions of people each year. A ER doc in VA used orthomolecular medicine to cure sever sepsis patients. Mainstream big pharmacy solutions are chemical strait jacket. Not a single parent in NAMI meetings have stated that their adult children who are compliant on their media are cured. They speak of three to four year cycles where it flares up again and they have to find a new drug or chemical strait jacket. They have to get disability status for heir kids because they are lucky to hold a job as stocker. This should not be accepted, our hospitals are building Cancer center and heart centers and big pharma see the profits in these drugs while the mentally ill suffer. Yet even now will we ever find a cure for cancer or diabetes? Likely not because their is huge profits in keeping patients patients. I
    Hope not to offend anyone, but if you could cure your family of these diseases by changing the way of life be cognizent to what we putt in our bodies, maybe we can stop this disease progression and shut off the genes for our future family members. Our food is run by corporations using pesticides and the soil does not have the needed trace minerals anymore hat our bodies were built to require. We all can make a change! No wifi in the house with developing brains hard wire instead.

    Yes call me paranoid now, but we don't have schizophrenics in our family, a great aunt with bipolar on my husband side, it lots of alcoholics through history in both sides. Maybe hat was the prescription for anxiety. Nutrition is medicine for the body.

    My son has improved already some he has lost his ticks and dystonia symptoms, he takes a Epsom salt bath nightly and his holistic psychiatrist has delivered the Walsh protocol To test him and find the orthomolecular needs for him. I have the vitamins compounded for ease and acceptance. If it pulls him through to some marked improvement without other drugs I am going to lobby our government to push insurance and hospitals to accept this as a insurance covered and best practice study by NIH. We are in a epididymis state with the number of autistic children. Drugging our kids for ADD when their other options in Otho molecular. Dr. Saul states vitamins are safer also based on adverse reactions and overdoses with traditional media killing thousands. I lost a friend to depression when she hung herself on mess for depression. Depression is bad suicidal thought are worse yet they all have this warning.

    Anyone out there with positive results to Orthomolecular medicine, NAMI tells me we must medicate immediately, we did and his life got worse and he does not comply but vitamins he will accept and take.

    I feel your pain ...but I am not going to settle for letting my son just wander drugged losing his identity and personality and creativity! Leaving him to suffer and when I am gone he won't survive. They have shortened life spans due to the lifelong psychiatric drug use.

    If Mark Vonnegut improved on ortho molecular and lithium which is a natural substance also not synthetic chemical, and he went on to med school and a successful practice as a diagnosed bipolar with delusions hat once was committed as a schizophrenic, then I am on board to trying this first! Remember cures hurt capitalism. Reality check in the world we live in. Traditional medicine they spend 15 minutes and throw a drug at you. Real help..the true healers In healthcare are set this and are getting frustrated they can't heal. These true healers are open to Alternative integrated medicine. Smoking vapor and drinking and pharmaceutical drugs abused in high schools are a threat for many children to come, but food is the easiest fix we can start early and teach our kids brain envy instead of cellphone or sneaker envy hey have today. Yet his has to happen every year nutrition and at home in meal planning and what vitamin is in the food we prepare and how it affects our gut brain and our head brain. Food Matters and Gut brain are streamed on a,axon and Netflix. This all has helped me exercising daily on my bike I tears at he beginning and now I am more confident and strong mentally to handle my son. Don't give up and settle be an advocate and if you find the things that help please share with your local NAMI and state metal health. Diary each day as you introduce these changes so you can catch the good days and quantify even slight improvements.
  20. Vicki L Wille's avatar
    Vicki L Wille
    | Permalink
    I have dealt with this for 15 years and am so ANGRY at the system which does nothing to help schizophrenics. No brain scans to measure what is occurring, no complete exam to understand what is malfunctioning. Just fill them full of drugs which make the drug companies money.
    In Canada the TrueHope company has great information on how to actually get the patient healing but even they can not get the mainstream to listen.
    I am trying to get my son committed long enough to get him to understand his problem. So far no help and I am at my wits in.
    I believe a class action law suit against the drug companies maybe the only way to bring attention to this travisty. At this time I am not clear on how to approach but it is something I intend to try and instigate.
    Our society cares more about unwanted dogs, tortises, opposed to people with BRAIN DISFUNCTION which is what is occuring.
  21. Jessica's avatar
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    The stories sound so familiar. MY son was diagnosed at age 16. They made it seem like as long as ge stayed on his meds. .he would be able to live a Pretty normal life...That hasn't been the case.He's been in and out of hospitals and jail.It's been a fight left and right to try to get him help.He is 20 yrs old now and currently under commitment papers in a hospital.He has been talking about killing someone/his self and wore a mask to the neighbors as he beet on the door before dawn. My daughter and I love him more the life but we are both scared and drained that we are no longer ourselves. As with the other stories. ..it is sooo much more to this story...Where is the HELP? I know about NAMI.
  22. Rhonda's avatar
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    I feel for you,women and men. Im lucky because we have clinics in Bremerton and Port orchard WA. It's a struggle for them to want to try medications. They have strong Negative side effects. Chris used to be on Risperadal. He would be waxing and waning. I had to ask what that meant. The nurse used to bring him his meds at the house. He's now taking olanzapine the med, and bentropine the side effct pill., and the injection flue something if that helps. Everybodys different. But I would find a good Mental Health place.
  23. Rhonda's avatar
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    My Name Is Rhonda Baker I live in a small town Port Orchard Wa. I am a mother , Mom of a 33 yr old Paranoid Schitzophrenic. I live with all our boys, My Husband is wonderful and were still married. My Son Chris is in jail. The police came here over demestic Violence with Chris called the cops. My other son Brian beat him up bad and Chris made threats to hut the family. I know he didnt mean it he gets angry comes down and opologizes 10 15 minutes later. But I dont think the judge is going to drop the no contact order this time. Im afraid for Chris, Thats why Im choosing to leave My big expensive beautiful home so chris isn't out in the cold. I know he's not lucid most of the time. He goes to Kitsap mental Heath and has and sees his treatment Coordinator. every week, Who says He's on enough medicine. He gets an injection and pills. He's not doing very well. I do talk with Kitsap Mental Health. I don't want to see Chris out on the streets. I know thoses were idol threats, Just like Madonnas comment she thought about blowing up the you know! I heard she was investigated. Bottom Line Chris is better off here with his loving Family than out on the street in Bremerton violence and evil people with guns And anything goes. its a mess out there and we love our SON!! Not to mention its cold wet raing all the time he has nowhere to go. He has a loving family that loves and cares about him.
  24. Lynne's avatar
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    Thank you all so much for your heartfelt stories as they all touched me. Ana, yours in particular.
    I feel as though we are living parallel lives and almost grieving a death of what our child was.
    This is so hard for me to accept and I am having a hard time staying strong for myself and my daughter.
    This is so exhausting and draining and sad.
    I'm reading Dantes Inferno and right now don't know which ring I'm in

    We need hope and they need us to have hope.

    I feel so alone and used to be very outgoing and social, now I choose to make no friends. I don't see the point.
    How awful is that? It's self protection.

    It's our life now I guess
  25. mike's avatar
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    Our Daughter was diagnosed with Autism at 3 years and struggled in School and life. A week before her 18th birthday she started hearing voices and crying all the time. After the nightmare of trying to get her admitted she spent a month in the psyche ward of the hospital. Once the insurance ran out she was “cured”. 4-5 different meds and we got back a medicated zombie who slept most of the day. She is now 22 and can barely function and still hears voices. We are exhausted and my wife has to bear 90% of the appointment load. I wonder what is going to happen to her when we die. I have lost my faith and wonder why some people have situations like this and some don’t. I feel your pain and only people in this situation can really understand what it is like.
  26. Brother's keeper's avatar
    Brother's keeper
    | Permalink
    My brother is thirty five and has had schizophrenia since about five years old. I live with him and my 63 year old mom in a low income apartment complex. I used to have the semblance of a life but no more. My brother takes several medications daily just to be able to function as a human halfway decently. It's still very rough though, and sometimes the situation is touch and go when he gets into one of his irrational behavior modes and nothing said can reason with him, usually over some trivial issue that he makes into a tempest.
    Schizophrenia is really tragic madness for not only the person afflicted but for those who are willing to support the person. My mom never gets a break from the constant stress of dealing with her disabled man-child, and he will never be cured of his disorder. No one who doesn't live in proximity to a schizo can know how difficult and frustrating it is to deal with one. Our father is a completely selfish piece of sh**t who was divorced from my mom when I was three, and he has never tried to understand even half-heartedly his son's disability or be involved in it. My mom's siblings (my aunts and uncles) who were once lightly supportive with morale have also turned a blind eye now that my mom's rich mother is being cared for in dementia at great expense. They have plenty of money too but prefer to keep the old rotten vegetable alive rather than use some of her millions to help out my mom, who has never gotten a proper break or even token recognition of her ordeal from them. They don't give a damn, because they have conveniently labelled my mom as the Black Sheep for some of her past shortcomings. Well, to hell with them. Relatives are the worst hypocrites and will spurn one faster than a complete stranger will. If anyone has read Agatha Christie they will know that she possessed an uncanny ability to portray her fictional characters in pitch perfect situations whenever it came down to money and the fighting (and killing) over it. I never realized how spot on she was until this all happened in reality to my family and showed me what the people you thought you knew are really like. You don't.
  27. Elizbeth's avatar
    | Permalink
    My son has schizophrenia - it is a nightmare for everyone involved, a complete nightmare - for him, for me his mom, his father is not in the picture and never has been and is a useless waste of space. This is the most awful affliction. It wrecks families. It has wrecked my son's life and my life. I hate it.
  28. Lorie's avatar
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    My son is now 19, diagnosed at 17, turned 18 and refused to take his meds...one short stay at the behaviorial center later, and we have absolutely no idea what to do next ..He was the most amazing, loving, friendly child....now he's a shell of his former self...doesn't talk, uses finger snaps and head mods to answer questions..stays in his room, laying in his bed, staring at the ceiling lights for hours...refuses to see a Dr, lost all of his friends, won't go anywhere, has become mean to an outside cat when he used to love animals so much he would literally cty when he seen those commercials asking for $$ for abused animals.....he has all of the negative symptoms..wen he was first diagnosed he was having delusional thinking, but we don't know if he is now or not because he thinks that if he admits to it we will put him back in the hospital...I have since quit my job I take care of him because we are afraid to leave him unsupervised before long because he has literally left and it took us 2 days to find him....cops being little help because he's an "adult" found him an hour and a half from the house sitting in a car garage in a city hes never been before..reason he gave us was that he needed some time away...from what he couldn't say.....It makes it a smidge easier knowing that we are not alone....it is the most heartbreaking thing our family has ever seen or has gone through...it's like watching a monster eat away at your child and not being able to do anything but watch...it's tearing us apart
  29. Scott Bryant-Comstock's avatar
    Scott Bryant-Comstock
    | Permalink

    Contact the NAMI hotline - 1-800-950-NAMI (6264) or info@nami.org The NAMI HelpLine can be reached Monday through Friday, 10 am–6 pm, ET.
  30. Jill's avatar
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    My son is 25 and mentally ill. He refuses to seek help at the hospital. This would be his 3rd stay for a relapse due to medication changes. He actually ran off when I tried taking him for help to the hospital recently. I've had to take off work for the last week. How do I get a petition or guardianship over him in order to seek help at the hospital. The police and ambulance in my small town refuse to help transport him to the big hospital that has a mental health facility. The doctor won't petition unless he sees him. Their office offered zero answers on getting him help and into the hospital. No one tells you what to do in the doctors office. I need him transported cause he will not go with me. I'm stuck at home caring for him. Afraid of his behavior. The last thing I want is for the police to come to our home and end up arresting him for aggressive behavior. Why have all these professionals let me down. Given absolutely no answers in steps I need to take. I feel so lost at what to do next.
  31. Catherine A Krull's avatar
    Catherine A Krull
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    how do you choose between your third great husband and the husband who does not understand your almost 38 year old son and the life of hell from paranoid skitsofrenia his real father and family have deserted him and now i have to choose between f inally somekind of happiness or leaving my son alone which i f fear will definitely kill himself these holidays aproaching i feel so hopeless my heart aches how do i even think of picking between my own flesh and blood to my husband who truly loves me i am 62 and just wish i were dead can't bear my sons pain anymore or mine
  32. Patricia's avatar
    | Permalink
    A blog with useful info for families and patients with psychotic disorders:curetoschizophrenia.blogspot.com, My son was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia when he was 30s. After a difficult period coping with depression, anxiety and paranoia, My son feels his illness is under control and permanently cure using herbs, thanks to a very effective herbal product called CONSUMMO. In the midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside of you and everything will be okay, don't ever give up. check out the link to know more: http://curetoschizophrenia.blogspot.com/ or contact me with this so I can share our experience with you: patberg080@gmail.com
  33. Barbara's avatar
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    Great thread. I have been taking care of my daughter who was diagnosed with schizophrenia for 14 years. She is 31 now. It was easier, although not easy when my husband was around, but when he died suddenly a few years ago, I am left to do everything myself. Work, cook, clean and on and on. Y daughter takes medication, but it is not magic. She is ill, does not drive anymore and depends upon me. I will never let her go. I am committed to caring for her, and am honoring my husband's wishes by doing so. Lately, as I get older, I am feeling more depressed, anguished sometimes. She also has no friends, and people do not want to come here. And of course my heart breaks for ,y daughter, seeing her life so compromised. I am glad to have found this blog. I needed to speak today. Thank you for listening
  34. Dorothy Jund's avatar
    Dorothy Jund
    | Permalink
    My son was diagnosed with schizophrenia when he was 13 years old. His father my husband did not know how to handle this diagnosis of his son who excelled in academics and sports, he committed suicide 8 months after my son's diagnosis. Along with support from family and friends I am finally getting the hang of the health and legal systems.My son who is only 16 now is in an excellent Neuro rehab center in Texas. He has just recently been diagnosed with O.C.D , extreme anxiety, and PTSD. I have been to 2 rounds of NAMI classes. They have helped but I wish I would have had help navigating the mental health do's and don'ts. Right now I try to keep a sense of humor(Like when I locked us both in with gorilla glue trying to fix our screen door.) if I don't laugh I would cry!!!!!!
  35. Ausha's avatar
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    Well I sure can relate to a lot of you here. I too deal with a person with schizophrenia. My sister was 17 or 18 when she started showing signs (she's now 19). I though it was merely a mental break down seeing as though my mom had passed and she was doing to well in school. She was in California at the time when this all happened, she wnt do there to start fresh and join job corp. Everything seemed to be working out well until I started getting phone calls from both her and my cousin who she was staying with. Both of them kept saying how they kept getting into arguments. My sister would say that my cousin would spy on her, it got so bad that my sister called the cops. I guess my cousin got tired of my sisters shit so she drove to san jose California were my sister was supposed to get for job corp and bought her a hotel room for a week-mind you I'm all the way in Colorado and can't do shit. My sister knew no other family member down there in California. lucking she came across a shlter for teens. to make a long story short, my sister went slightly mad. My sister would talk about how people her trying to fight her and just talk about weird thing I couldn't understand. I truly wanted to believe my sister, but all of this just seemed off. Later down the road I found out she had been placed in a hospital. After she was released shr seemed fine, she had gotten a job and had visited me. She had went back to Cali and bam! she change once more and it's been an adventure every since. She has no one but me. Every time I see her talk to herself or step out of character I feel for her. I know I don't know how she feels, but just like her I have changed. I am a part of a life I never thought I'd have. I fear for her future, I cry for her pain and hope for peace in this life with her differences. And to be honest I fear for my future but I know everything happens for a reason.
  36. Diane  Severson's avatar
    Diane Severson
    | Permalink
    Reading these comments has comforted me, knowing our family isn't alone in dealing with this devastating g illness. We suffer, but my son suffers the most being diagnosed with schizophrenia 20 yrs ago he continues with delusional paranoid thinking even while on his medication. He has worked a steady job until his recent medical emergency and 3 surgeries. Now it looks like he might not be able to work which makes his days and nights even longer for all of us. As a family we do worry what will happen to him when we aren't around and he worries too. He has very little insight into his illness but never the less doesn't fight meds or drs visits which we are greatful for. We expect respectful behavior from him or else...and he knows he could lose alot of his independance if he doesn't comply, so far, so good. We take one day at a time, and continue to trust: God, our own jugement, our son's better self, and the systems in place in our community, we advocate when necessary, keep lines of communication open between family and doctors and live as fully as possible each day. Ithas been possible to have a life for all of us through this devastating disease but it takes a lot of work.
  37. Brenda's avatar
    | Permalink
    My son was diagnosed 9 years ago with schizophrenia. He is 27 now. There was no clear information of what to expect. I thought if he got on the right meds he would come back to us as the young vibrant popular man he was. This is the worst disease there is as many health professionals have told me. With my son being 18 I constantly was faced with no longer being his legal guardian so I would struggle to be given any information of his treatment. I went to court to become his private guardian. He believes I am controlling him. He is very demanding. Tells me I put him in the hospital and convinced the doctors he is sick when he isn't. The verbal abuse is constant. He seldom shows appreciation for all I do and if he doesn't get what he wants he becomes very mean. I am a single mom at 53 that went back to be a teacher am a foster mom and lives alone in an acreage with horses dogs and a cat. I decided not to work full time this fall as I cannot teach and deal with everything my son requires. Unfortunately I am getting more withdrawn from my son as he is so negative to be around. This disease sentences not only the victim but all that love them. I have blamed myself. I have researched and searched every resource I can get my hands on about this disease. I hate the medications they use to treat him. He had been on them all it seems. Abilify olanzopine cloxapil etc etc. We lose him when he is manic we lose him when he is over drugged. Then every so often I see my sweet son come back. He will hug me and tell me what a good mom I am. He will tell me I am one of his only friends now. And this is the only payment I need to keep fighting for him to have the quality of life he deserves. I am trying to step back now and see if the system will take care of him so when I can't I'll know he'll be ok. I do not want my daughter to be the next care giver. That is not fair. So I push fight and am the squeaky wheel to get the help he needs to ensure he is and will be taken care of by the supports I am putting in place. The system is so flawed. Parents should not have to fight, feel guilt, or feel judged like we somehow were bad parents and caused this illness. Although we have a system that is greatly lacking here in alberta my heart goes out to others as I believe they are worse by what I'm reading. I am now looking looking into supplementing my son with vitamin b12 and foliate...Google it. .there seems to be deficiency of these linked to mental illness.The pharmacist told me it would not effect his regular medications to supplement this. Make sure u always ask before giving any addition vitamins etc. Love and peace to all of u. It's a hard road given to very special parents. You are amazing! Your kids are amazing. Journal. Find support groups of others that truly understand. Stay positive! You still have ur child! Maybe sometimes it feels only physically but they are in there. I'm thinking we parents are going to get moved to the front of the line when we are lined up for the golden gates😊❤
  38. Amoo's avatar
    | Permalink
    This is the saddest thread I've ever read. Is there truly no hope for a life for people with schizophrenia?

    My 24 YO son was very recently diagnosed with what appears to be schizoaffective disorder. Two too short hospital stays ensued in the past 2 weeks. He's in his third now, which should run longer until he is stable on meds. He just completed a tough college degree a couple of months ago and if his mental state was better, he would be working. He was barely holding it together before committal, and when the meds work he's the sweet person that I know. I'm hopeful for him to gain clarity, and to enter an outpatient program to help him re-gain the skills he lost. He had a circle of close friends for many years and pushed them away as the darkness closed in. I know they still care for him and that he can rebuild those relationships if he can get perspective.

    Any advice? We are fortunate to have good insurance and good resources - at least as long as we continue working.
  39. Scooter's avatar
    | Permalink
    schizophrenia Has gripped what was the most beautiful kind boy. He is now 22 and deep into his mental condition. He wrecks havoc on the family. Abusive, yelling, the Devils everywhere, he is going to kill him self. He is paranoid of Cops, authority. The pot he smokes now makes him look like a mad crazed manson type figure. Wont shower for days. Locks himself in a trailer for days. I have now idea what to do or deal with it. I don't have money ,there are no hospitals that will take him. He will either commit sucide, get arrested and get killed in jail or other? I know I am not to blame but its a living hell what his sickness has done to us. I have no hope or answers……. So tragic. It must be terror for him……….
  40. Brigette's avatar
    | Permalink
    It's 230 am here. Another night of restlessness. Prayers. Questions of why I am the sole caregiver to my 26 yr old son with shitophrenia. I have always been somewhat of an introvert and I wonder if that was gods way of preparing me for this isolated life of caring for a mentally ill child. My sons has been telling me of the bad thoughts he has that are inconceivable to me. I don't know what to do. I want to believe that these will remain thoughts and never be acted upon. He takes his medicine regularly I don't know how much longer I can ingest this without getting so depressed myself that I can no longer continue to push forward work take care of all my responsibilities and be there for my other children a grandchild on the way and my husband of 13 yrs who is a fantastic understanding soul but how long can he be expected to endure this life? This is a 24/7 episodic situation. My neighbors. By now. Realize there is something amiss. My son does not have one friend at 26. We recently helped him get a small home of his own very close to our home. But while he feels a sense of independence the fact that he has no friends or a companion is even more pronounced and his new neighbors are realizing he is different. Even when he goes to support groups he is with others who are perinood also. Finding a friend seems unlikely. How can a god life be so cruel. To my son. And to me to have to watch and endure. His father has basically ran away. He will not deal with him I feel so angry I get angry at my son. He is mean to me and I am so resentful. My world feels like it is claim g in on me and it takes all I have to try to stay afloat. I have gained 70 lbs. I eat my eamotions. The ups and downs of this journey leave me exhausted and listless. I am having a hard time taking care of me. And my other kids. They are all young adults but this illness takes up so much of my energy there is barely anything left for the others. My youngest has turned to heroine. He has been on this for three plus years. I want to run away but my conscious and concern and love for my children will not allow me to walk away. I feel like it's time to save myself because I cannot seem to help anyone.
  41. Jeannie's avatar
    | Permalink
    My son was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia in 2007, I have seen him arrested and put in paddy wagon because he didn't take his meds. I've seen him in jail because he pushed a nurse when he was off his meds, nurse suffered redness, she stated my son was a thug because he had tattoo. My son called police on me when I was his payee. He had an episode once on mothers day, police handcuffed him, as he waited to be transported to hospital. He cut his wrist before. He is 33,he lives with me and his father. He wears mask, kunfu outfit. Walks in neighborhood with red boxing gloves. Currently not on any prescription or street drugs...but he is very argumentative, can't have a civil conversation. He was under commitment I can go on and on. Too much to share...I'm just tired one minute I want him out of my house yet I don't want him homeless. In order to get help he must comply with mental health facility, he feels the only thing he needs from them is housing.
  42. Susan's avatar
    | Permalink
    These stories sound so familiar. My son is schizo affective and is noncomplient on his meds. At age 22 he has allready been inpatient 14 times since he was 19. He has been to every Phsych Hospital and clinic around. I am simply spent.Laws need to change so these folks cant sign themselves out of group homes and treatment. it is exausting to advocate and work on getting him help, but then he refuses it??? I hate the thought of leaving him homeless, but there aren't many options left. when he comes home he gets very abusive and agitated. He "self medicates" by abusing pot which sends him into a psychotic episode. If you implement a restraining order, then you can't advocate...it's a visious cycle. SCIP, hospital, home, court system... we need a better way to manage psych patients care. My son can be scarry at times, other times he is my helpless little boy. I feel very defeated in all of this. Especially each time they Hospitalize him, I feelmlike I failed again.
  43. Catrina Malloy's avatar
    Catrina Malloy
    | Permalink
    I would like to speak with you regarding my son NC sucks!!!:(
  44. Karen Wilhoite's avatar
    Karen Wilhoite
    | Permalink
    I to have a son 18 autistic with manic depression, cognitive delays and PTSD. He is mean to me then when the rage is over he acts like a little child. I just told them today he cannot come home I am scared he has ripped a door off cabinet drawer. Closets are broken, bottles fly he tries to tip me out of recliner so it will fall on me. I love my son but cannot tolerate anymore abuse. I feel lost and alone it is just me and him.
  45. Ana's avatar
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    I am so tired. I have been dealing with my 28 year-old schizophrenic son for many years. At first, he just had some auditory hallucinations as a teenager. He seemed to be able to at least pretend normality after his hospitalization. I almost felt that it made him worse. I could only see him at designated times. When I did, he was like a shell. They wouldn't allow him to go until he was stable and that meant that he had to pretend to be "well." Over the years, it just got worse. By the time he was in college, he had decided that I was a horrible person. he told his grandparents stories about me which they chose to believe. It made everything worse. It wasn't until he began to get really bad and I simply could not deal with the verbal abuse he regularly unleashed on me, that he also began to do the same to his grandparents. It took years but they finally are starting to understand the depths of hell I live everyday. I miss the little boy who was so curious about the world. I miss the little boy who would be so excited to go to the zoo or spend an afternoon playing in the pool. I miss the adolescent who seemed to have the world at his feet because he simply understood math beyond his years. Most of all I miss seeing him smile and actually seem to be happy. These days he is sullen. Everything is a complaint. He never "feels" well. Everything is a result of something someone else has done to him. He is either Superman and knows more than anyone else or he is despondent. He tries to say the most hurtful things he can to those whom he is supposed to love. He lies about taking his medicine. He will claim that he has a perfect memory and that others are lying because they don't remember the things he remembers. He is easily offended, so even when someone tries to befriend him, he believes that they are insulting him in some way. I have to make up excuses so that when he is calling me more than 50 times in less than an hour, I won't appear to be distracted while I am working. Meanwhile, I don't know if he is going to do something very drastic or realize that he must take his medicine so that the demons will subside. There is no one I can talk to about the horrors of watching someone you love, whom you held in your arms as a baby, sink into an abyss which he seems to want to drag everyone around him, into. I don't know how much longer I can continue to keep a positive outlook for the sake of my other children, my husband and those close to me, as he chips away at every relationship he has, including with me. I fear that he will succumb to those demons which have taken over his mind. I know my little boy is in there. I want him back. It just isn't fair. I tell no one outside of our family because I don't want to lose the last chance he may have at some sense of normalcy in the way he is treated and viewed by others. This is hard to do unless you are somewhat isolated, which we are. We keep people at arms length. Mental illness is just too scary for most people. There are days when I want to shout from the rooftops about his struggles and how it hurts all of us but it would only cause people to move further away, when what I really wish I could have is a legion of people willing to encourage him to stay on his meds and let him know that they see that incredible little boy who is still there. It has been a rough day. Sorry. I just need to tell someone about this hurt before it consumes me. I hate this awful disease.
  46. Judy L.'s avatar
    Judy L.
    | Permalink
    As my son got older he became less scary and agitated. He lives with me and spends almost all of his time in his room, except he occasionally goes out at night. He is afraid the neighbors will see him. He is now 40 years old, won't take meds, is obese because he gets no exercise staying in his room. I've been thru the typical son-with-schizophrenia hellish life. Now I'm almost 70, and have health problems. I worry about what will happen to him when I can't take care of him anymore. I had a "special needs trust" made to take care of him, but the contract says that the trust company (which will get everything I own when I become incapacitated or die) is NOT LEGALLY REQUIRED to do ANYTHING for my son. It says they "may" give him money to live on, but they don't have to. They "may" arrange for a "care manager" for him, but they don't have to. The trust company "may" let him remain in the house, and "may" maintain the house for him, or they can sell it, or even give it away to anyone they choose. They can put my son out on the street if they want to. The lawyer says, "But, they have a "fiduciary responsibility" --- two meaningless words that are never mentioned in the contract. They are not legally required to do their "fiduciary responsibility." Also, if anyone tries to contest the actions of the trust company, the beneficiary (my son) will not receive anything. The trust company will keep everything until my son and I are dead and then the money will go to the person I named in my will. This Special Needs Trust horrifies me, but I can't find any other options.
  47. Wanda allred's avatar
    Wanda allred
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    Drove five hours to let my 36 yr old schizophrenic son into his apartment after he was transported back to his rural community after being released from a psychiatric hospital he had been admitted to two months ago after stopping his meds. He is confused and paranoid and doesn't know what is real.I
    Have to go back to work five hours away. The county has him on a wait list for a foster home. It is heart wrenching, I feel like I may never see him alive again.
  48. Paul's avatar
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    I am the primary caregiver for my 29 year old son who suffers from paranoid schizophrenia. On March 18, 2016, he made 4 deep cuts across his wrists. I heard screaming from the next room and cautiously came in. There were two pools of blood under his desk where his hands were hidden. Fortunately I saw a pool of blood on the desk. (The room was dark as he never wants lights on because of the voices)
    The medics and police arrived in time and he was Baker Acted into a downtown hospital in Jacksonville, FL.
    5 days later we received a call saying he was discharged from the hospital. My wife works full time and I could not make the 2 hour drive immediately. I was stunned that someone with 21 stitches in his wrists was forced out of the hospital and the head of Psychiatry said as far as he could see, N. was OK. I have a DRAFT letter to go to the hospital and doctor who released him. I explained he was still a danger to himself and to others. An ambulance dropped him off at home around 10PM that night. Just one event in a caregivers life. My son was diagnosed at 15 and is not 29. Someone who has actually tried to commit suicide is far more likely to do it again. You can only imagine what this does to the caregiver. Paul
  49. Lexi's avatar
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    MOMS - Please come follow my blog! I am trying to start a campaign to get more people interested in helping children with mental illnesses. We need raise awareness. We need support. We need the rules re-written when it comes to KNOWING OUR CHILDREN and knowing when they need to be admitted, and when they need true help.
    My brother was recently committed by police on a 5250 hold, and treated for Schizophrenia and Bipolar. It took not once but TWICE at the hospital on a hold for the mental ward to recognize that he needed HELP even though he was begging and pleading them to HELP HIM.
    He is (like many comments I just read) a master manipulator. No one believes the struggle we go through.
    We have to UNITE and we have to stand TOGETHER as a family and raise awareness for this and BE HEARD.
    PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE email me @ mimomsunite@gmail.com
    and Please don't be discouraged by the blog, I just started it this morning.
    PLEASE lets share our stories and figure something out!!


  50. Sherry's avatar
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    My 42 yr old son has had schizophrenia since 16. Eldest of 7 children. Been hospitalized countless times with group homes as well. Medicated with Clozapine for 12 years. Still doesn't clear voices. I'm an R.N. It doesn't get easier, but you can survive this. You must not let mental illness steal your own life too. It took years for my husband and I to have a team effort towards him. It often falls on one person to drive the dark streets and sit in the padded treatment rooms. I have plans to write our story. It is an incredible tribute of courage and tenacity, on all our parts. I love my son more tonight than I did the day he was born.
  51. Rio's avatar
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    My daughter is 17 and has severe paranoid schizophrenia. (Along with my 15 year old son who is bi polar) the job is endless. She can never sleep because of the voices and nightmares. And he can never sleep because of the mania (a symptom of bi polar.) not only can neither of them sleep, they can't be up alone. If they're up, I'm up because I can't trust them. The last time I went to bed I woke up to my daughter trying to climb up to the nieghbors house and spy on them because she thinks they're plotting to kill her and they're sending their 8 year old son to spy on her. They're both been hospitalized many times and meds are almost useless. The episodes of their illnesses can last days or weeks. There is almost never a break in the storm. And even though I am about ready to rip my hair out, at the end of the day, I love them. Because they're my kids. They had this illness since before they came out of my stomach. And think about it... How would u react if u heard voices every day telling you people are watching u or if u had sever mood swings every day? Id be freaking out too. And I would want help love and understating too. I love them and I will continue to fight till I'm dead and gone ❤️❤️❤️
  52. cheryl's avatar
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    My son was diagnosed January 2015 with paranoid schizophrenia he is 29 and i need help badly he keeps wanting not to take his meds this is the 4th time he's been put on something different to take, he is on abilify and not wanting to take it he then gives me a lecture of how this medicine will kill him and would i rather he stay on it or see him dead! And the he calls me evil cause i want him to stay on his meds! I can't take it anymore my only other support is my daughter who thinks its okay for him to be off his meds (i should let him do his thing) she says; and they both been reading up on schizophrenia so now they are experts, well if that be the case why when he plays doctor with himself does he go back to hearing voices and looks panicky and lies thru his teeth to the doctor about how he is doing! The rest of my family is afraid of him so i have no support at all and I am 56 yrs old and fighting a disability case for myself due to my health and PTSD that i suffer with, and also trying to get him on SSI, he won't go out of the house and he won't try to work, he has been hospitalized twice both times under a Mental Hygiene Order that i filed on him so that he would not walk out like he did twice when he volunteered to go in. I been researching till i am blue in the face and cannot get the help that he really needs, i love him but enough is enough, i need to find a group home or something for him and i cant seem to find one in this area that i live. I have not called NAMI but was told to go ahead and call them but if there is nothing in this area then what do i do, my older daughter is supporting us both right now but my god how long does it take to get actual help! So that we can all breath and know that he's going to be okay!i have nightmares of waking up finding him gone, he has dreams of the end of the world. Can somebody please tell me that there is hope and what and who do i need to speak with to get the proper help! Now also we are poor we have medicaid for insurance. I need tomfind a group home that will help him get on his feet again or a caseworker even to come on a daily basis and a councilor for him tomtalk with, he has no friends at all. I'm thinking if i can get him more involved with life again it will help him a great deal. At least I hope so. I love my son he is my last born out of 4 children and my best friend as well but i am at my wits end inntrying tonfind help here for him. Hear is in the State of West Virginia which our mental health org, really does not provide much help at all. He heeds help!
  53. Heather's avatar
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    My son was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia just this past February, although I knew for some time now he had a mental illness. He is now 19 about to be 20, it's been a nightmare trying to get him to see someone for an evaluation. I called every where, hospitals, police, mental health, and searched the internet high and low for some sort of direction. In February his psychosis was so severe head grab his head with both hands screaming " I just want to blow my brains out " it was horrifying to watch. Prior to this he could somewhat control it in front of medical professionals, he was what I'd call a master manipulator. I know it sounds horrible but I was so relieved when he had this breakdown, finally someone will see what we were going through, someone would BELIEVE me so I could get him some help. Its been several months since then, lots of tears, stress, feeling helpless thinking he will forever be like this and I will be caring for an adult child for the rest of my life. Believe it or not he's gotten better, we just recently took him off the depakote he seems to focus better without it but he still needs the zyprexa, otherwise it sends him back to severe paranoia, seeing things, hearing voices, thinks everyone is out to get him. He may not be the the so called "normal" but I am thankful for the progress he's made. So please don't give up, don't stop showing them love, they don't know what they are doing or saying and it's not THIER fault. The other day my son told me he was proud of me for being such a good mom to him. I cried, not bc I was happy but bc I thought it was all my fault, I did something to cause his mental illness and he thanking me.
  54. Beth's avatar
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    I too have a son that was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia. It has been roughly 12 years now. I love and protected him so much. People can be very cruel. I love my so and I will do anything possible to get him somewhat back on track. Its been a long haul but Ill never give up on him because of his Mental Illness
  55. Linda's avatar
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    To: Sally dated april 7, 2015. You just told my story. I'm doing this alone. No resources, no doctor as of yet. My son calls the police on me if things don't go his way. Berates me, says the most awful things to me, is jealous, manipulative, forceful, domineering, frightened out of his wits and it's 24/7 !!! Iv'e eaten 20blbs back on my frame and want to crawl in a hole and die!!! He's not human at the moment. Can't go outside, thinks people are going to kill him and has no concept of time, deadlines or personal care. Left to his own devices he is on the streets, literally. He's had to see people be stabbed and mistreated and wake up on the pavement. He has no friends, at 29 years old, has not one friend. I'm at a loss as to why the powers that be, and they are clamping down on us normal citizens, won't take him in for some sort of evaluation. He needs a residential program. WHY NO HELP?! We are poor. People will see to it a dog in a sports shirt gets more help than our people! Justice please, compassion and some help. Why are street drugs so popular? Why do people drink themselves to death? NO COMPASSION IN THE MEDICAL COMMUNITY! The Feds are taking away all manner of basic meds to assist the living and grandma now has to go to the streets to get relief...When drugs are outlawed, only outlaws will have drugs...shame on you USA. SHAME
  56. Holly Stevens's avatar
    Holly Stevens
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    My son is nineteen and newly diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia, although I've known for a while. I have researched to the end of the internet and back, yet nothing I seem to do helps. We are trying a new medication tonight and I pray this one will help. The last one didn't. I feel like I am losing my mind because I am with him all of the time. It's hard to explain but I have to stay with him or he will go back to his old ways. I've never taken medicine for depression but I feel so depressed at times that I just sit and cry. And then I feel better, until the next meltdown. I felt like I wrote Morning Zen. I cried from beginning to end. My family, who has always been there for me, doesn't reach out anymore and I am so angry with them. How could they leave me now?
  57. Scott's avatar
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    Here is a link to the NAMI support page - http://www.nami.org/Find-Support
  58. Vanessa's avatar
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    Diane, NAMI hears you. Find your local organization.
  59. Sally's avatar
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    My son has schizophrenia and is 32 years old. I have fought and fought for years to get him the best help. My son is very mean and rude to me. He calls me terrible names, cruses at me, manipulates me at every opportunity. I am exhausted from it all. I am 62 years old. How can I continue to allow myself to be emotionally abused just because he is labeled mentally ill. I am so tired!
  60. Leslie Walsh's avatar
    Leslie Walsh
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    I just had to get my son committed again. I have been caring for him on my own since he was sixteen, and he is thirty-two. I feel so much grief and have had so little support from family, and none from his father. I feel like I tried to be a good caregiver and failed. I think I suffered burnout. He has been hospitalized before, and I never felt like this until now.
  61. Veronica's avatar
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    I'm desperate to my 19 year old daughter help. She was away at college & suffered a breakdown during her second semester. She was hospitalized for 7 days & has refused help for the last few months. When she does share her delusions with me, it takes everything in me not to cry. She's also now stalking a man that she believes got her pregnant telepathically. I'm afraid she may end up in jail. She's getting worse by the second. I'm terrified! How can I help her when she refuses to see a doctor?
  62. Debra MAYNE's avatar
    Debra MAYNE
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    I also have a son age 38 who was diagnosed an has this disease of schizophrenia.its so hRd he was going GREAT an now he will not take his medicine.my other sons wife is scared of him.he was staying with his older brother but we are now taking him back to FLORIDA with us. Just now learning myself ABOUT your groups.I need to KNOW all I can
  63. Diane's avatar
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    I love my son, who is mentally ill., but want to change the laws on forming and getting him the right help. Who,s out there and hears me?
  64. debra's avatar
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    I just ate a piece of pie and a bowl of icecream....I don't know why, because I will have a stomach ache. I started experiencing problems since my son was diagnosed with schizophrenia at 19.

    He's 26 now, and it is a very, very lonely life and I will never know how many times my heart has ached for him.....many, many nights though out the years.

    My son is lucky - he has two brothers who live with him and love him,keep him busy. I'm around the corner. I barely can keep up with the day to day monitoring (bringing groceries, making food to "drop by", ect..).

    I have found for us the most important warning signs of impending psychosis shows in my son's eyes....I then know he needs help.

    I take care of my 80 year old parents; between all three it is a full-time job. It is a cruel world. Sometimes I keep so busy I find myself not able to do anything for a day or two....then I bounce back....it is so, so hard. But we love him, what else do you do if you love someone?

    I don't have much in the way of resources, but I do know I couldn't live with myself if I didn't do what feels right. It is a hard thing to have a child with schizophrenia.
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